Storytime: L is for Love, Libras, & Big Little Lies

If you could’ve seen the way my jaw absolutely dropped when - unprompted and unprovoked - the most random person ever spilled all the beans and the gravy. It was giving ✨Heaven sent✨.

For the past eight months I’ve been dating a man who I sorta kinda fell in love with. He was charming, kind, persistent, consistent, he cooked, he cleaned, and to top things off he was an incredible lover (girLlll). He was real real reaaaal close to being perfect for me. The only problem? Just this wee little voice deep down in the pits of my stomach that told me something was off.

Spoiler: she was right.

It was a pesky little voice; both certain yet so unsure. Was this intuition or just my nervous system’s response to dealing with a man?

Girl I couldn’t tell! Or perhaps I didn’t want to….

But look, it was the first time in a long time that I felt special. I felt seen, I felt heard! A tingling sensation grew beneath my eyes, tears fixing to well when-

“Matcha Mango Shake!” a warm voice calls from the distance.

I’m at Ora Cafe in Leimert. It’s the first coffee shop we’d ever gone to together, even though when I first brought him he already knew the barista. I wonder now if they knew what I know now…

Sigh.

I sit back down, smoothie in hand, and think about how I wouldn’t be almost-crying in public if I’d just listen to my inner voice. I suppose this was the lesson to learn.

It wasn’t til six months later, when the voice started to deepen that I considered her concerns worthy. But by then, we’d spent my birthday together - a day he showed up and out for. Sure, he still hadn’t asked me to be his girlfriend, and yes he avoided conversations around commitment… but he was consistent! Isn’t that what mattered most?? (smh)

And then there were the slippers…

Now girl look, don’t judge me. I was clearly ignoring more than just my inner voice.

But when I first saw them I’d asked about them and without a beat, he casually shared how he’d found them in an empty closet when he first moved into his new place.

It was believable enough (lmao). It’s not like anything was particularly feminine about the slippers, aside from being a size 7. But why, I’d ask myself every time I saw them in the corner of his room, were they still here?

It obviously didn’t add up. But it also made no sense; we were spending most days and all nights together. I had a damn key to his house for crying out loud!

Who’s damn slippers were these?! I needed to get to the bottom of it.

So I did what made most sense. I took them. Sho did.

I wanted to see what would happen next. Would he notice? Would he care?

Ladies, and this is when you know you’re too far down the dag on rabbit hole. Because why instead of playing Sherley Holmes did I not just walk away from a clearly suspicious situation?

I guess I wanted to see how the story would play out, sans dignity!

As fate would have it, three days later in the middle of the day, he called to ask if I’d taken something of his.

Welp. You’d think that would’ve ended it all. *looks down in embarrassment*

Look I’d just watched Two Can Play This Game and Shanté** had me feeling a type of way, okay?!

So what did I do? I played dumb.

“Did I take something of yours? Like what, babe?”

Of course he couldn’t say much without incriminating himself. It was like the Spiderman meme, both of us waiting for the other to confess.

Well, neither of us did.

He’d never know what happened to the slippers, and I’d never know whose they were. And I was going damn near crazy.

So I did the only thing I could think of:

I asked God for clarity.

You ever hear of those prayers people talk about where if you ask God to remove people from your life he’ll do so expeditiously? Well girl, in my case it was 48-hours.

If you could’ve seen the way my jaw absolutely dropped when - unprompted and unprovoked - the most random person ever spilled all the beans and the gravy. It was giving

✨Heaven sent✨.

The reveal was juicy. It came with receipts. It answered the random unanswered questions I’d swept to the back of my mind in hopes they’d somehow disappear.

It was a big Little LIE. One that created a web of them.

Girl….. *sips matcha*

Wanna take a guess what it was?

Subscribe for part two ✨

**at least Shante’s man was trying to do right by her. Kinda?!?!